Nitty~Gritty

random thoughts about my life

I take a hot bath to get ready for going out. As I'm laying on my back I think about how when I take a bath, I'm never completely covered with water. My breasts always are on their own, just out there getting cold. I take a long look at my tattoo which is on my pelvic bone. I remember getting it over a broken heart. He didn't like girls with tattoos which always made me want one. I remember looking at it constantly. I'd look at myself in the mirror with the tattoo looking back and I'd think...."wow, it will always be with me." I am forever changed. I must have looked directly at it for a full year thinking "I wonder if I'll ever go a day without thinking about it." As I laid in the tub, I wondered when the last time I took a good look at it. The color is still beautiful but it's changed. At one time it had stretched with my belly when I was expecting. It hasn't been the same since but it's actually changed with me. It used to represent not belonging to anyone but now it represents life and the life that grew in me. Getting a tattoo was another experience of pain that produced beauty and pride but I'd rather go through getting 100 tattoos at once over going through labor again.

posted by: hookemup at 21:20 | link | comments (5) |

Comments:

#1  17 January 2004 - 23:13

 

The tattoo was once a sign for something: catharsis, release, independence, survival? Maybe none of those, maybe all of them. But all this time later, the sign has shifted: now it represents something else altogether. This is what I love about things. That the inention of an act need not be that act's only meaning. That what something means can slip and slide and change right along with us. This is for me about hope and possibility, that what we do and say need not remain stable, that meanings can change, that the signs and symbols of our lives are not fixed but, like us, subject to revision. Nice entry; loving your blog.

zithereen

#2  18 January 2004 - 07:27

 

beautifully said zithereen. Thanks

hookemup

#3  18 January 2004 - 16:47

 

i got a tattoo over a shattered heart as well. a claw for each finger (click). of course, now it's not about the pain anymore. it has become a reminder to always move on and be the best i can be.

BanzaiDescent

#4  19 January 2004 - 10:37

 

I have a tattoo on my back. Got it because I didn't think anyone, including me, would have seen it coming. And it's behind me so I go weeks without thinking about it. And I miss it. I've heard that tattoos are addicting. And I do want another one--one where I can see it every day. But I can't justify it. It's been done.

serenaluchang

#5  19 January 2004 - 21:14

 

I so need a tattoo now. or ten.

I've got scars, though. the poor man's tattoo. ;) and I agree with zithereen; one of the greatest things about symbols is how they evolve with us.

mictlantecuhtli

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